the joy that is a hardware store

dear lovelies
I was passing a hardware store the other day in the car and exclaimed enthusiastically to my friend, 'Now that's a really good hardware store over there. They have a great paintbrush section' It was, I thought, an unremarkable comment, but she turned and said to me in a tone of huge disappointment, 'What has happened to you? You used to be so sophisticated! You used to be my sophisticated friend!' 'Well,' I replied, wanting desperately to retain some air of sophistication,'I really don't see how the two things are mutually exclusive?! I can be sophisticated and love hardware stores and play the ukulele! It's called diversity and multi-tasking.'

Okay I confess a love for a good hardware store. That intoxicating smell of steel and rubber mixed with a bit of grease and garden fertiliser - you can't beat it. All those neat rows of shiny hammers and drills. What's not to like??

A good hardware store represents hope and possibility. The hope that yes you can renovate that disgusting kitchen and make it into something you could actually cook a meal in and the possibility of all those DIY projects you've dreamt about becoming reality. Yes of course you can convert the crumbling fibro garden shed into a palatial outdoor gazebo and of course you can make a fantastic bed out of those recycled timber doors and floorboards. Why do people want to crush your dreams?!!

The only thing that is wrong about hardware stores is that they don't really fit in with the current austerity measures that I, dear reader, have been attempting to implement. Going to a hardware store and not coming out with something handy like a multi-head screwdriver and a bag of gladioli bulbs is nigh impossible. But like the Spanish people I have been rebelling against aforementioned austerity measures. The government policy on such fiscal matters is going to have to change. This rebellion happened about the time that I realised that the $15 I was saving each week by denying myself my daily cappuccino (HUGE sacrifice) really needed to be about $15000 worth of savings to be of any use!! 

So Katerina della Austerita has been thrown out of office and Katerina della 'Ardware rules OK?! and she's like roolly sophisticated......

yours in the aisle with the really cool wheelbarrows

Katerina xx

some handy pre-purchase renovation advice

renovation

Variant of renovate

transitive verb renovated, renovating

1. to make fresh or sound again, as though new; clean up, replace worn and broken parts in, repair, etc.
2. to refresh; revive

the 8 rules of refreshing and reviving a house with broken parts in the cold cold mountains

1. never ever buy said property !

2. bad luck if you did buy it now you have to pay

3. never buy a property with a large liquid amber tree in the front yard with roots that extend under the house and are heading rapidly towards the sewerage pipes

4. marry a professional tree lopper

5. if the tree lopper has bad breath go for the electrician

6. never buy a property that has a sloping and inaccessible driveway that has no drainage and becomes a muddy sodden river of mud in the rain

7. forget marriage get it on with a structural landscaper who can build accessible concrete driveways

8. before you sign the contract realise that the house is a giant wooden ice cube and you are never going to feel warm.......ever again

yours feeling a little bleak in renovation land

Katerina xx

vomitus carpetus

dear lovers of a good floorboard

My house was feeling a little queasy the other day and vomited up a bunch of ancient, filthy carpets and lino but I think it feels a whole lot better now.......

The dust and dirt of the ages descended upon the carpet removal crew, Mel, Stella, Ingrid and myself, as we furiously tore and ripped our way to the bottom of layers of filthy carpets and lino to reveal the most beautiful hardwood floorboards. The transformation of the space was astonishing.

BEFORE

I use the term carpet loosely.......

AND AFTER  

gorgeous hardwood floorboards revealed

Ingrid and Mel apply finishing touches

I cannot wait to see the floorboards sanded and polished in a few weeks time. Luckily due to the fact that the original lino was never removed (judging by the pattern it dates back to at least the twenties or possibly even earlier) and layers of carpet variously stapled and nailed to the floor over the years, the floorboards have been beautifully preserved. The whole space feels transformed now that those smelly and disgusting carpets have gone. My thanks to the wonderful team of friends who helped in the transformation. The psycho room is no more. There is still more carpet and lino to go in other rooms but the worst has been done and the results are amazing!

yours in need of a really really good shower

Katerina x

ACME Carpet Removals 
'No carpet too putrid - no house too dilapidated'
Mel, Stella e moi  - carpet rippers extraordinaire